Home > Other bits and bobs > A million things (list, 2002)

No.80
Building a boat.

No.79
Haveing hair like Neil Diamond had in the mid 70s for just one day.

No.78
Going to the Antarctic.

No.77
Living a whole day in the style of Miffy.

No.76
Writing my name over and over again until it looks, y'know, not right.

No.75
Listening to a song with delicate piano work and pretending to play along with it on the edge of my desk.

No.74
Sitting at the other end of a bowling lane and seeing a 16 pound ball coming straight towards me.

No.73
Using everything on a Swiss Army knife for a legitimate reason in one day.

No.72
Wondering how exactly Yves Klein made that blue so blue.

No.71
Pretending the floor is a mountain and 'climb' it.

No.70
Imagining all the people. Ever last one of them.

No.69
Painting.

No.68
Writing a list.

No.67
Drawing a comedy penis in the steam on the bathroom mirror.

No.66
Burying myself under all my clothes and bedsheets and duvets and pillows.

No.65
Swallowing pills without water.

No.64
Eating a whole pack of Tic Tacs in one go.

No.63
Watching a fly cleaning it's front legs.

No.62
Running to the kitchen and back twelve times.

No.61
Eating a baked potato.

No.60
Running backwards.

No.59
Dying my hair pink.

No.58
Wondering if I'll ever write 1,000,000 things here without repeating myself.

No.57
Visualising every bedroom I've ever had.

No.56
Wishing I was Pooh.

No.55
Going to Lincoln Cathedral. Or any nice building for that matter.

No.54
Drawing a chair.

No.53
Pumping up my bicycle's tyres.

No.52
Taking Polaroids.

No.51
Continuing planning the village I map out in my head on nights that I can't sleep.

No.50
Making a rubber band ball.

No.49
Sharpening pencils.

No.48
Chewing gum.

No.47
Going to a flea market.

No.46
Moonwalking.

No.45
Entering my flat in a Miami Vice style.

No.44
Singing along to Easy Lover by Philip Bailey & Phil Collins.

No.43
Testing all the pens to see which ones have run out of ink and can be thrown in the bin.

No.42
Watching athletics on TV.

No.41
Going to the video shop.

No.40
Playing with an Etch-A-Sketch.

No.39
Standing in a petrol station and inhaling the sweet sweet petrol fumes.

No.38
Crazy Golf!

No.37
Learning how to moonwalk.

No.36
Doing some press ups.

No.35
Sticking a cotton bud in my ear.

No.34
Re-learning how to sail a boat, and going and doing it every weekend.

No.33
Learning calligraphy.

No.32
Typing 5318008 into a calculator, turning it upside down and giggling like a child.

No.31
Cooking some eggs.

No.30
Hiding under my desk and pretending you can't see me.

No.29
Repeating everything you say like I was your echo. Your echo.

No.28
Run around in a circle shouting, "Twenty eight twenty eight twenty eight."

No.27
Trying to empty my brain of all thought.

No.26
Thinking of football players who's names begin with each letter of the alphabet.

No.25
Talking in an old-fashioned Victorian manner.

No.24
Pretending to be Kate Winslet in 'Titanic' holding onto an imaginary Leonardo as we wait in the "cold water" to be rescued.

No.23
Waiting however long it takes to hear the 'hidden' track on a CD album.

No.22
Talking to myself.

No.21
Cycling.

No.20
Wearing boxing gloves.

No.19
Recreating the sleeve of 'Brothers In Arms' by waiting for a pinky-blue sky and then throwing a metal guitar in the air.

No.18
Doing a puppetshow.

No.17
Listening to 'Hide And Seek' by Howard Jones.

No.16
Playing Hide and Seek.

No.15
Playing darts.

No.14
Playing billiards.

No.13
Playing snooker.

No.12
Playing pool.

No.11
Bowling.

No.10
Camping.

No.9
Singing in the rain.

No.8
Blowing up balloons.

No.7
Playing frisbee.

No.6
Doing robotics in front of the mirror in the lift.

No.5
Reading Chaucer.

No.4
Having a bath.

No.3
Cutting my toenails.

No.2
Feeding the ducks.

No.1
Sitting at home, dunking digestive biscuits into a piping hot cup of coffee.