Flip Flop Flying

Moan moan moan

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Oh, I’m getting quite annoyed with constantly having something wrong with me. Not annoyed enough to rectify my unhealthy lifestyle, of course. I’ll keep on smoking those deep-fried heroin sandwiches. My ears are still a bit blocked up, the eye’s still blurry and now I’ve got the sniffles. It’s like my whole head is closing up. At least my mouth’s okay and I can still moan about it all. But it’s making me even more cranky than usual.

Today I was half way through some revolving doors at the local shopping centre, and two woman with pushchairs both tried to get into the same segment. Any idiot could see that this wasn’t going to work with the revolving door’s don’t-push-or-touch-or-I’ll-stop-revolving policy, but they went ahead anyway, trying to push their pushchairs around, but constantly nudging the door to a stand still. I could feel my head about to explode with impatience. Which wouldn’t’ve been that bad, cos at least it would’ve cleared up a couple of my piffling ailments.

Written by Craig

May 9th, 2005 at 5:15 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

7 Responses to 'Moan moan moan'

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  1. Ah, be sure to get well soon. everyone goes through times like that…

    I love revolving doors too. But even better are the ones with buttons on the wall next to them that you ‘push’ to open.

    Or maybe thats just me…


    9 May 05 at 22:36

  2. I’m going through a very similar period of sinus-based misery at the moment (any good cure ideas you come up with would be much appreciated – I can only think of whisky). Although I haven’t seen any revolving doors today.

    I did see an old man in the woods sitting cross-legged on the ground smoking a pipe even though it was absolutely pegging it down with rain, mind.

    grey kid

    9 May 05 at 23:10

  3. If it’s any consolation, I had a really terrible migraine at the weekend, tunnel vision and everything. It would have been quite trippy, like a Missy Elliot video, if it didn’t feel like a man in big boots was kicking me in the eye the whole time.

    I didn’t see any revolving doors though. I like the really big ones you get in airports that fits five people and their trolleys, but in England people are still a bit polite about it and try not to go in with anyone they don’t know

    Mark Hooper

    10 May 05 at 10:17

  4. Oh god, poor guy… but I couldn’t help laughing out loud because of the vivid picture of these optimistic old ladies. Wasn’t the situation hilarious enough for you to clear out the cavities in your body? *pet pet on the head*

    Elisabeth Redlig

    10 May 05 at 11:25

  5. Hello,

    I’m feeling for you. I get this problem all the time and you feel like such a div when you can’t quite catch what people are saying. ok I think you should:

    Steam your head over a bowl of water with a couple of drops of Olbas oil in(is Olbas oil international?)


    if you reckon you have a bit too much wax, put a few drops of olive oil in your ears every night for a fortnight. (Warning – it may get worse before it gets better)

    Hope you feel better soon


    10 May 05 at 14:22

  6. I’m not feelin it, you damned sissy! Get off yer moaning ass and draw me some new friggin’ pixels dammit!

    Just kidding.

    Get better soon.



    11 May 05 at 12:39

  7. Working my way from the top down:
    Orange: I like them too.
    Grey: old men with a pipe in the woods – it’s how I like to see myself as I get older.
    Hooper: poor you with the migraine. I empathise.
    Elisabeth: not hilarious, just annoying.
    Sal: olive oil, eh? I got ear drops from the doctor. It feels like someone’s putting lit matches into my ears.
    Derick: yeh yeh yeh… I’ll be pixeling soon-ish.


    11 May 05 at 13:13

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