Last night’s dream:
I was in an airport, just waiting there for the ‘plane to be ready to start boarding and stuff. Tom Cruise came up to me and asked to see my passport. He said he thought I looked like “him”, and pointed to a picture on the wall of a criminal in a blurry surveillance-camera photo. I protested, Tom told me I had to stay there until the FBI had interviewed me. I made repeated attempts to make my flight but to no avail; every time I went to the desk they told me to wait for the FBI.
Fast forward, I’m “back” in the USA, talking to a guy who, it seems, was a former employer. I told him I would do half-price work for him (as some sort of scientist) in exchange for cash in hand.
I was living at a lodging house. My real-life ex-flatmate was the landlord and a real-life family I know were living in the attic. An guy I knew at college was my room mate. He was a DJ, (still is, it seems), and was playing me some records when, for want of a better word, snot came out of my nose. It wouldn’t stop. It came out as a solid tube, kind of like a very long icicle. It kept coming and coming and eventually, I laid it out flat along the skirting board and it went around two sides of the room. My scientist boss came by and got excited when he saw it. He got out a machine – like a geiger counter or something – and took some readings. Then held a microphone to the snot and we heard that it made a humming noise. Then he told me that it had low “ayan” content and high “bayan” content, and look, if he switched on this UV light you could see that it had neon in it.
Next thing, I’m sat on a balcony with my feet resting on a wheelie bin. My feet keep leaving black marks on the bin like a bicycle tyre does on a white-washed wall. My feet were hot. Just before I woke up, I realised my feet were melting.
Some of that makes sense. Last night I read an email from a friend about her boyfriend who’d been held by the immigration people in the UK and subsequently deported (a very sad story that makes me deeply ashamed of my country). “Bayan” is a word I saw a lot in Istanbul over the doors to ladies toilets. Tom Cruise? Well, you can’t move on the internet these days without seeing pics of him and her out of Dawson’s Creek, can you? And, okay, it’s possible I might’ve picked my nose in bed last night, but as for the rest: no idea at all.