Archive for October, 2007
This a half-finished version of a new Ohne Titel dude. I thought that it being Hallowe’en and all, this is a fairly appropriate version to put up.
Finished version tomorrow.
The other reason I was in London was for the NFL game at Wembley Stadium. Right here, I should say that I went to the game as someone who was neither a fan nor a hater of American football. I went with two things in mind. First, to see the new Wembley (quite nice; a bit indentikit-modern-stadium, though). Second, to find out if the sport was any good. As I’ve mentioned before, my love of baseball came from seeing a live game, so I wanted to see if this football game could help me enjoy a sport that looks quite exciting sport in the fancy ESPN highlight packages.
Well, the day was fun, despite the rain. First off there was the “Tailgate Party.” This was a bunch of stuff inside the adjacent Wembley Arena. You could catch a ball, throw a ball, kick a ball, watch a shitty band, drink beer, eat hot dogs… All quite enjoyable. Lots of British fans of virtually every NFL team (or, as my mate John and I called them, “sad lonely virgins taking a day off from their masturbation hobby”) were there, seemingly having a great time.
The bad weather made the outdoorsy bit of the party a bit of a damp squib; not much more than someone dressed as Dolphins mascot, and a big, scary, robotic player.
Stadium filling up nicely an hour before game time…
Then they brought out some British sportsmen to get us cheering. Former England rugby union player Martin Johnson, Formula One driver Lewis Hamilton, and Chelsea FC player John Terry. Johnson and Hamilton got lots of cheers. Terry was greeted by a lots of boos. I joined in. It’s just too easy to not like Chelsea players.
Some indie band – I forget their name – played on the pitch to further whip us into a wet-trousered frenzy. They were rubbish. But they were accompanied by some ladies dressed in way too few clothes considering the weather. They weren’t rubbish.
Here’s a dude praying that God likes his team more than the other team. His team lost, so God must not like him.
The game was dull. And, sadly, I just don’t get it. I don’t really see why so many folks enjoy it.
I tried to enjoy it, I really did. But I spent most of the time trying to work out where the ball was in the middle of all those dudes. Only when it suddenly got chucked to someone on the outskirts of the big fight did I notice what was going on. And, without wishing to get too tabloid on you, I enjoyed the cheerleaders a lot more than the sport. The Miami Dolphins’ Human Resources department seems to have got VERY lucky with their job applicants; cos ALL of the cheerleaders have great legs, asses, hair and tits.
Despite not really ending up an American football fan, I’m very glad I went. If for no other reason than getting to see that greatest of British traditions: the streaker.
I was in London for a couple of reasons. The first reason was that a friend of mine was getting married. I like having an excuse to wear a suit. Don’t do it often enough. I wonder if it is just because we are so used to seeing men in suits, but we really do look a hell of a lot better in a suit that any other type of clothing.
I think the champagne must’ve affected me, because I did spend a lot of time dancing at the reception. It’s been about five years since I’ve cut any rug, and it was rather enjoyable. I think dancing will catch on with the youngsters. Remember where you heard it first.
Best song of the night for me was one that I’ve not heard in a long time, one that was a favourite of mine when I was a little boy in the 1970s, and one that I’ve never heard played “out” before: “From New York to L.A.” by Patsy Gallant.
Here’s an mp3 of the aforementioned song should you fancy trying out some of this dancing lark.
With a nice bit of forethought – the sort that usually passes me by – I loaded Brian Eno’s Ambient 1: Music for Airports on to my iPod before I went to London for the weekend. I was genuinely quite excited about listening to the album in an airport. I do wonder why I’d not done it before.
Once I got to Flughafen Berlin-Schönefeld, though, my excitement bubble was, rather inevitably, burst.
I guess that airports must’ve been different places in 1978 when Brian Eno made that album. They probably were far more exclusive places; mainly used by rich people, businessmen, and balding arty rock stars. There was no easyJet-style airlines to bring the tone of the place down, for one thing. Fewer pasty-faced families dragging their obnoxious children off on weekend breaks. Minimal security theatre. You could probably smoke cigarettes, too.
All in all, Music for Airports – in its intended environment – doesn’t feel relevant. I think I’ll stick to listening to it at home from now on. I wonder if it ever did feel relevant, though. And, of course, I wonder if I’m wrong: have you listened to it in an airport? How was it for you?
I bet you can’t guess which sporting event I’m going to at Wembley this weekend…
… and you still see men who are old enough to know better wearing their caps at jaunty angles.
I really am flummoxed by human beings sometimes.
As I mentioned in September, the October Mix is likely to be the last one for a while. I doubt I’ll bother doing any as I’m flouncing around Latin America. And, as promised, I’ve done a special mix (I think so, anyway) for this last pre-hiatus mix.
It’s over two hours long, and comes in three parts. It doesn’t particularly have any left field choices; it’s just a bunch of songs that I really really love. The three parts are kinda intended to be one long mix, but, hopefully all work separately as individual mixes. I hope you like them, too.
october2007mixpart1.mp3 (45’13 62.2MB)
Oh What A World – Rufus Wainwright / Untitled (Samskeyti) – Sigur Rós / Run For Me – Richard Hawley / This Will Be Our Year – The Zombies / The Winner Takes It All – Abba / Don’t Worry Baby – The Beach Boys / Up The Junction – Squeeze / When Love Breaks Down – Prefab Sprout / Your Silent Face – New Order / Sail Away – Randy Newman / I Believe In Rock & Roll – Bill Drummond / You’ll Never Walk Alone – Gerry and The Pacemakers
october2007mixpart2.mp3 (45’45 63.0MB)
I Wish I Was In New Orleans – Tom Waits / Heaven – Talking Heads / Sad Song – Lou Reed / The Puppy Song – Harry Nilsson / Arthur’s Theme – Christopher Cross / Hard To Say I’m Sorry – Chicago / The Boys Of Summer – Don Henley / Tunnel Of Love – Bruce Springsteen / Turn It On Again – Genesis / Together In Electric Dreams – Giorgio Moroder and Phil Oakey / We Go Together – John Travolta, Olivia Newton-John, etc.
october2007mixpart3.mp3 (41’53 57.7MB)
Song Sung Blue – Neil Diamond / She Belongs To Me – Bob Dylan / To Go Home – M Ward / Born In The UK – Badly Drawn Boy / Since U Been Gone – Kelly Clarkson / (Drawing) Rings Around The World – Super Furry Animals / More Than A Feeling – Boston / The Good Life – Weezer / Itchycoo Park – The Small Faces / What Became Of The Likely Lads? – The Libertines / November Rain – Guns N’ Roses
And, until the end of the month, I’m putting all the old mixes back up for you to grab. One time only offer. If you want any of them, (check out the original blog posts linked below for details about each mix) email me, tell me which mix(es) you want, and I’ll send you the link(s). Email address is in the column on the right.
August 2006 Mix / September 2006 Mix / October 2006 Mix / November 2006 Mix / November and a Half 2006 Mix / December 2006 Mix / January 2007 Mix / February 2007 Mix / March 2007 Mix / April 2007 Mix / May 2007 Mix / June 2007 Mix / July 2007 Mix / August 2007 Mix / September 2007 Mix
Sometimes, the real world doesn’t play the game. This morning, I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth, with Billy sat next to me wondering if I was going to just hurry up and take him for a walk, when I glanced at the back of the t-shirt hanging on the radiator. The back of this particular t-shirt has a big number seven on it, and the word “Mantle” above it. It is, of course, a New York Yankees Mickey Mantle t-shirt.
My mind wandered and wondered if there were two more baseball players that could complete the basic interior structure of the Earth. One walk around the park later, I dash to my computer and search on the Internet for a player called “Core”.
Yes! Danny Core. Two down, one to go.
Please… pleeeeeeeeease let there me a “Crust”…
No Crust. The closest I can get is Fernando Cortez; corteza being the Spanish word for “crust.”
As Meat Loaf so memorably said, two out of three ain’t bad…
Due to my recurring iritis, I’ve been to see the same eye doctor many many many times. Hopefully, I’ll have seen her for the last time. I’ll miss her foxy receptionist, but I won’t miss sitting in the waiting room, staring at the door to the doctor’s office, willing the patient already in there to only have a minor problem so I can get in there quicker and stop having to look at those same damn pictures on the door.
And when one looks at something over and over again, one starts to notice that the no-mobile-phones sign looks very very old now. Mobile phones didn’t even look like this when I first visited her surgery seven years ago. One notices how bad the drawing of the woman is. Where the hell is her neck? Why can’t we see the right arm of her specs through the lens? But the one thing that does my head in is the photo of the old people.
They used to just look like a happy couple who like having eyes that work. But now they look like an evil man who wants to buy my children and force them to work in a diamond mine, and his evil wife who will howl with laughter as my children are dragged out of my arms.
Aside from my trip to the eye doctor, today’s been one of those days where interesting little things happen to perk up my day. First, I was stood at a pedestrian crossing, blankly staring into the street, when a guy in a passing car suddenly made a face at me and stuck his tongue out. Then I saw a middle-aged woman with sandy hair with about two inches of pink dye in her fringe, and her Yorkshire terrier also had a splodge of pink dye in his sandy-coloured hair between his ears. And then I saw that various bits of my work got a nice write-up on the Guardian web site.
I like fun days like this.
I had some vaccinations this morning. It kinda hit home that I’m actually gonna do this: go off and
bum around have a sabbatical in some hot foreign lands. Woo and hoo.
I had injections against flu, hepatitis A, hepatitis B, and rabies. I’m feeling happy now, knowing that I can have bum sex with a rabid wolf without contracting so much as a sniffle.
Since getting the jabs, my Ohrwurm has been the The The song, “Infected.” Being a dolt, though, I’ve been singing “inject me with your love” all day without even noticing my error…
Landsberger Alle, Berlin.
Sorry to bang on about my book, but those of you in the US may be interested in this pretty good deal that Amazon.com is doing.
You can buy both my new book “Atlas, Schmatlas” and my 2005 book “Fun Fun Fun” together for $24.45. When you consider that the recommended retail price of the atlas alone is five cents shy of twenty dollars, it’s quite the bargain.
This is Ohne Titel 3′s snow(wo)man sex doll.
If there were a title, which there isn’t, but if there were, it’d probably be “I’ve Never Seen ‘Scent of a Woman’ So I Don’t Know If Your Impression Of Al Pacino Is Good Or Not”.