I woke up this morning disorientated. In my dream I had hung out under the U-Bahn tracks along Schönhauser Allee, trying to use cocaine. I was unwrapping a piece of paper containing the drugs, but it was windy, and I was aware that it would be a tough thing to do. Also under the tracks were One Direction. All in a car, during a pause while making a video. Harry told me he had epilepsy. And Billy was with me. When I woke up, I had the tired eyes, where they feel heavy and puffy and don’t want to open. A quick flash went through my head, because I don’t really remember feeling that so much in Mexico City. I wonder if it’s a dark European winter thing that causes that in me. But mostly even though I was awake, taking my morning photo (see below), my brain still thought something was real: that Billy was with me. I called out to him, because he wasn’t on the bed. I was awake, I knew I was awake, but I still thought Billy was here in this apartment. As we have all said at some point in our lives, I wish my dream was real. (Not the cocaine bit, obviously, because that is a horrible boring drug.)
I made a decision when I got to this apartment that every morning I would take a photo. There a tiny balcony, so every morning, I open the doors, stand on the door frame-y bit and click. It’s a nice habit, I think, mostly because it means I’m actually (but only just) outside first thing in the morning, breathing fresh air. And I like the idea of being inappropriately dressed in cold weather to really feel the weather, cos obvs, I do this before getting dressed so I’m usually there bare-footed in my t-shirt and underpants. Here’s the ones I’ve done so far. I intend to keep doing this. The payoff obviously comes when it snows. Please please snow, Berlin, I want it so bad!
The song in my head when I woke up this morning
Two songs. I’m starting to realise this isn’t uncommon, having two songs (usually by the same artist) going back and forth in my head. This morning it was History and Drag Me Down by One Direction.
Here’s an interesting Wikipedia article
Ordre des Arts et des Lettres